Memoirs of a Feral Cat

20 back into the plant. “No!” I screamed. I was hungry. What sorry creature came between me and my meal? A slobbery, hairy barker was tearing down the street, heading straight for me, making enough noise to wake the dead. “What else? A dumb mutt.” In a few bounds I reached the nearest fence and raced to the top, skimming the wood beneath my claws. The canine was under me, jumping up and down, turning this way and that, and yapped, yapped, yapped. It matched me in size, but besides the relentless barking that accompanied its dance, I didn’t think it capable of doing much damage. I sat down to watch the show. Then a disturbing sight got my tail pounding the fence. Bendy Ears trotted up behind it and watched with a cocked head. The noisy, hairy thing paid no attention to her. “This animal is under my control,” she said. “We live together, and it’ll do whatever I want.” “Bastet preserve me!” I knew dogs were dumb but to be submissive to cats? They were more stupid than I thought. “Prove it,” I said. “Tell it to go home.” She sat down. “Look at that happy face. It’s having so much fun. These four-leggers are so easily amused.” She then proceeded to lick the top part of a front leg. “You’re siding with the enemy. What kind of feline are you?” “Like I said, I’m the top cat. It knows if it wants to live in comfort, it has to do my bidding.” Its annoying barking faded behind her words that came crashing through loud and clear. “You traitor,” I hissed. “I can’t believe that you consort with cat- killers. You’re unnatural. You’re an embarrassment to all felines everywhere.” “You’re jealous of my power,” she stated, now licking her other leg. “I’ve got you and you can’t do anything about it.” “You have no power. You’re hiding behind a slobbering, hairy beast